New Year's Eve

"To live is the rarest thing in the world most people exist that is all" Oscar Wilde

It is finally here! The end of 2011 has dawned on us... Now many of us will be spending the day working, and anticipating the evening when we will gather with our loved ones and celebrate the end of a phenomenal year! Some of us will even be anticipating a hard-core party and some large quantity of alcohol to be thrown in our direction! I will be anxiously awaiting a night of fireworks and a good lengthy phone call with my family! But what matters what you expect of today if you lack the capacity to reflect on the year that has just passed?
2011 has certainly been eventful! I'd like to just comment on my family's strength for overcoming a lot of the crappy stuff that has happened to us this year and that we are still fighting right now, to all of you! May 2012 be a happier easier and healthier year for you all, I love you and I will see you all at some point this year. 
Enough with the sad sap stuff! Have you noticed the quote at the top of this post?! Wilde... a genius! Wrote some amazing plays and novels, a flamboyant man very much involved in the aesthetic movement! Frowned upon by many of his contemporaries and politicians of the time, yet he was observant enough to notice that in his provocative lifestyle - target of many tabloid articles -  he did what everyone truly envied him for: HE LIVED! Wilde lived his life in his own terms and in his own right, and I respect him for that! A wonderful talent and with a philosophy that the world should embrace!
Taking Wilde's inspirational words, this year I aim to Conquer My Life. I have lived very well so far, and made the most of my life so far, but sometimes I could have risked a bit more. This year I will at least try to take control of my life in my own way! I will go Wild[e] and make a fool of myself whilst I'm still young. You only live once! So don't just exist. LIVE.

Happy New Year everyone. May 2012 be your year.

Ahh the bane that is thought...

Daily routines can be pretty boring. They allow for the grey-matter we call brain to stop functioning in the basis that it is too accustomed to do the same thing constantly. Routines also permit thoughts to creep into your mind and disturb the peaceful working process. Thinking hurts. Thinking leads to more thinking and thoughts are dangerous.

Nowadays my thoughts tend to float to somewhere North East. They kind of get lost there and take their sweet time coming back to earth. ‘Would it not be wonderful if all the space between us would erase?!’ that’s what I often think. But now, more than anything, I think ‘would it not be wonderful if you were thinking that too?!’ In all honesty, dear readers, I am missing someone very much. I can’t exactly explain why, but the time and space continuum could not hate me anymore than right now, as it makes this distance a bit torturous. I’m not some sick psychopath obsessive compulsive person, no! I simply miss his company.

My friends talk about being in love, or falling in love, whatever. I’ve never believed in love at the age of sixteen, finding your soul mate, saying it would be forever. It seems so poignant when you first hear it, but in all reality, you don’t understand until you feel it. I’m nineteen and I stand by the fact that I have never been in love; but maybe this is what it feels like to fall... My 3 best friends from childhood claim to have found their ‘the ones!’ My best friend David is stuck in the same situation as I right now... free-falling.

I don’t want a guy to want me. I don’t want a guy at all! I don’t need a guy. It’s just him. I would like to understand, dear reader, how it is possible to be blessed with having this much feeling for someone, not knowing what to call it, and not being able to admit that it’s happening. David knows the brunt of it, figure he gets it. Maybe I just want to be swept off my feet.

David says this should be the year I conquer my fears, and one of them is being hurt. I see too many people getting hurt because they allow themselves to feel. Should I take that risk? I say this is the year I allow myself to feel and see where it takes me. It might end up taking me up North East... closing the gap of thousands of miles. It might even be that New Year’s next year will be spent there and not here. Be ready for the New Year readers. New hopes, new dreams, new things to aspire to. New beginnings.

PS: I make it a New Year's resolution to think less... it can cause migraines!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P8a4iiOnzsc Welcome Home :) 

The art of procrastination!

As a student, it takes a lot to distract my kind from our work... THAT IS THE BIGGEST LIE IN THE WORLD! The word student should come in the dictionary as a synonym for procrastinator! 
When I am in London I practically live in the library, because it is the only place where outer influences do not retract me from my studies. However, it is currently Christmas Vacations and I am a sucker for laying down in my pj's all day doing anything far from productive! 
Procrastination truly is an art! It takes a great deal of outer influences and suggestiveness for one to consider interrupting the creative flow... Unless of course the creative flow was not there in the first place! Technological advancements do not help at all. A computer's capability to have several windows open is inviting to the temporary distraction one requires, when you have been engaged in hours of endless thinking. Brain-processing needs a break as well, and things such as Facebook, Spotify, Myspace, BBC news or what ever else you seem to look at, provides the right amount of release. [let us not forget blogger, currently detracting me from script writing!] 
Facebook is the worse of them all though! There are certain people that should not be allowed to have facebook... either myself for having way too much to do on it, or HIM for being online when I would rather he would never have that facility. If HE was not online, EVER, or did not have facebook, I would not have a reason to sit and wait. As well as the fact that my best friends all have facebook as well, and they often invite me over or to do something, that in theory should take an hour, but stretches out to 3 or 4 in the midst of conversation and banter... Procrastination is an art advocated by the development of personal stress-releasing techniques, that aim to distract ones mind from the principle aim of GETTING SOMETHING DONE!
Should really get on with this script... But David is on facebook, and him and I always have a long-winded laughter filled conversation on some random something. At least let us thank the lords that HE is not online.

Goodbye 2011!

So let me just say, I have a list of New Year's Resolutions this year that I aim to fulfil. There is no way this space is going to waste this year. Once a month MINIMUM I have to post. I mean, I have started and ended at least 10 blogs in my lifetime. I am now 19 and I think it is about time I follow through with this blogging thing. After all, I love to write.
Back to the issue at hand. It is nearing the end of 2011, and what a year it has been! I have been on a roller-coaster this year [genuinely! I went to Thorpe Park for the first time EVER, loved it. Had been on roller-coasters in other places but not there...] September 2010 I moved out of my parents' house to London to study, and since then until now, it has been a non-stopping stream of events that have culminated in the end of a truly life-changing year! Here is my notepad calender that is written out on my computer, every year I have one of these and the 2012 one has already started!

2011 will be something like:
Quintin Head 28th January [done]
Home February [done]
Job Interview @ Laura Ashley 3rd February [GOT THE JOB! DONE]
BUCS 19th/20th February [done]
Hammersmith Women's Head 27th February [done]
Performance 16th March [done]
WOMEN'S HEAD OF THE RIVER 19th March [done]
TOUR Italy 16th to 22nd of April [done]
BUCS REGATTA May [done]
Exam [just the 1] May [done]
BABY NEPHEW BORN IN May [done]
Noah and the Whale LIVE 16th May [done]
Sports Awards Dinner 23rd May [done]
SUMMERBALL 28th May [done]
Portugal [north] June [done]
GLEE LIVE 26th June [done]
Thorpe Park! 28th June [done]
Nottingham [Anna and Rach] July [done]
MOVE OUT July [done]
Portugal [friends vacation] July [cancelled]
GENEVA [Mommy ♥] July [done]
19th Birthday 27th of July [done]
NEW House AUGUST [done]
Job in Richmond Theatre AUGUST [done]
BERLIN! [Saiesha] ♥ September [done! best thing EVER]
Slow Club Live 26th September [done]
The Faith Machine @ The Royal Court [done]
FIRST DAY OF LECTURES! [done]
South Pacific @ The Barbican [done]
EMMY THE GREAT 29th September [done]
Laura Marling 17th October [done]
Saved @ The Lyric Theatre 24th October [done]
Noah and the Whale [AGAIN!] 26th October [done]
Anna Calvi 1st November [cancelled]
Best Little Whorehouse in Texas 1st November [done]
The Grand Guinoll @ the Courtyard Theatre 2nd November [done]
3 Daft Monkeys 9th November [done]
Brighton 14/15 November [done]
TWIATHLON 17/18 November [done]
Portugal :) 19th-22nd November [done]
Marcus Foster 23rd November [done]
24 HOUR ERGATHON 8th/9th December [done]
RURC Christmas MEAL 14th December [done]
Slow Club with Emma Shores 19th December [done]
24/25th CHRISTMAS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! [done]
New Years Eve Celebrations 31st December
♥

Funny thing about 2011, is that it all fits nicely in a column! I look back on this year and think to myself 'Diana, you've done a hell of a lot for yourself!' I mean what self-respectful student can afford to pay for 5/6 trips? 8 concerts? 8/9 theatre trips? And a million competition race fees?! None! But I pulled it off. Scrapping every last penny of my student loans alongside my salary, I managed to give myself a pretty amazing 2011! Events wise at least. 

There is only one last thing to tick off that list, and it will be a fun-filled evening after the phenomenal display of Fireworks in the Thames! Most of my friends won't remember what happened that night, as booze will determine their state in the morning and whether or not their memories will be functioning. But I will remember. My sober self will have the photographic evidence and the clear image in my mind, of a beautiful farewell to the year that served me a lot of stuff to handle. In the midst of it all, the bright side. A new start, 2012 shall be better! We can make it better. So 10 trips? 10 concerts? 11 plays? And TWO MILLION competition fees?! Bring it on, I will be poor and dishevelled by the end of it all, but my list will be twice this size and I will again celebrate with a BANG! a year of fantastic experiences. 

I suggest you write down a list of your own with your eventful 2011, and ask yourself if you'd do it any differently? If you think you would... then make 2012 your year! That's my plan afterall!