Daily routines can be pretty boring. They allow for the grey-matter we call brain to stop functioning in the basis that it is too accustomed to do the same thing constantly. Routines also permit thoughts to creep into your mind and disturb the peaceful working process. Thinking hurts. Thinking leads to more thinking and thoughts are dangerous.
Nowadays my thoughts tend to float to somewhere North East. They kind of get lost there and take their sweet time coming back to earth. ‘Would it not be wonderful if all the space between us would erase?!’ that’s what I often think. But now, more than anything, I think ‘would it not be wonderful if you were thinking that too?!’ In all honesty, dear readers, I am missing someone very much. I can’t exactly explain why, but the time and space continuum could not hate me anymore than right now, as it makes this distance a bit torturous. I’m not some sick psychopath obsessive compulsive person, no! I simply miss his company.
My friends talk about being in love, or falling in love, whatever. I’ve never believed in love at the age of sixteen, finding your soul mate, saying it would be forever. It seems so poignant when you first hear it, but in all reality, you don’t understand until you feel it. I’m nineteen and I stand by the fact that I have never been in love; but maybe this is what it feels like to fall... My 3 best friends from childhood claim to have found their ‘the ones!’ My best friend David is stuck in the same situation as I right now... free-falling.
I don’t want a guy to want me. I don’t want a guy at all! I don’t need a guy. It’s just him. I would like to understand, dear reader, how it is possible to be blessed with having this much feeling for someone, not knowing what to call it, and not being able to admit that it’s happening. David knows the brunt of it, figure he gets it. Maybe I just want to be swept off my feet.
David says this should be the year I conquer my fears, and one of them is being hurt. I see too many people getting hurt because they allow themselves to feel. Should I take that risk? I say this is the year I allow myself to feel and see where it takes me. It might end up taking me up North East... closing the gap of thousands of miles. It might even be that New Year’s next year will be spent there and not here. Be ready for the New Year readers. New hopes, new dreams, new things to aspire to. New beginnings.
PS: I make it a New Year's resolution to think less... it can cause migraines!
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this is my point, what's yours? :)